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u”Are yOU a SPAMMER, Daddy?”

Did Mommy send a Spam email?

Did someone call Daddy a Spammer?

Reddit has a section on #explainlikeim5 so let’s do explain

what is and isn’t spam here.

Remember: Just because someone calls you a Name, it doesn’t mean that it’s true.

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imagespamgary3

SPAM is a meat in tin cans.

People laugh at it but eat it anyway.

They eat it a lot.

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But it’s funny because people still make fun of it.

People also don’t like it when some stranger sends them a bad email or Comments on Facebook because they are selfish and want to sell something and make money.

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The selfish people send thousands and ba-Jillions of emails out to get people to buy something that they don’t need. People get angry at that and say,

You Spammed me!

or

HI SPAMMER!

  1. It’s SPAM if you lie and get someone to Click on a lying link that takes you somewhere that you didn’t want to go. If you say, “LIKE my Facebook page” and instead you take me to buy you a new tricycle, that’s Spam. You have to tell the truth.

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  2. SPAM is a food that comes in a can.
  3. They make fun of SPAM saying no one likes SPAM in the tin can. That’s why they call bad emails “Spam.” A funny man made a video about how much he doesn’t like SPAM. Wanna watch it now?

    spammontyskit

    The Funny Man.

  4. SPAM is from a  🐷pig’s shoulder  🐷 You mix it with some junk, and make it almost burst out of that tin can so you can to ship to poor countries that don’t have meat. It won’t rot. Not for a long time. And almost nothing can hurt it.
  5. People in Hawaii are the winners of Eating The Most Spam, and they gobble up a bazillion-bazillion cans! They eat it like it’s an expensive and rich thing to do: they put it in something called “sushi.” (Are you bored yet? Should I continue? Do you have to go use the bathroom or anything?)
  6. Lots of Americans have jobs making a bazillion cans of SPAM. Americans complain about SPAM and make really, really funny icky faces about it, but they also eat 4 cans each and every second! Can you believe that?  Weird, I know!
  7. If you Message a stranger 5 times a day, that’s SPAM. It’s being a pest, like a fly that won’t go away. But Mommies and wives can email you 100 times a day and each email is important. Remember that!
  8. You can Mention me in a Tweet because you know me and I know you.
  9. But if I Tweeted a Tweet on ‘1 + 1 = 2’ and then you Tweet out to the whole wide world that’s on “1 + 1 = 3” that’s Spam. (So call me on the phone instead, or else I’ll get mad! And you know grown-ups don’t like a 5-year-old to make them mad!) If you have a problem with anyone, go talk to them first. Remember that for the rest of your life.
  10. If I Facebook a Group of people One Time about someone else who can Tweet your really happy Quote to 24 million people for you, that’s not Spam. I get nothing out of it and you can tell people about what it feels like to have a missing arm.

So don’t get mad and call people a SPAMMER if it’s not Spam.

You Have to Tell the Truth.

Now can you help me do the dishes?

 

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THE END

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The Grown-up Article is here.

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